From Parenting For Everyone, by Simon Soloveychik

This short story struck me.

My friend, a very good man, answered my question of upbringing.

“My father didn’t spend any time with me.  But whenever during the night I woke up I saw a slit of light under his door.  He worked… And I guess this slit of light taught me!”

Many good people say that their parents did not pay attention to them because they were busy, and “I grew by myself…”

Parents didn’t bring up, didn’t spend time with children, didn’t pay attention – they were busy, but the result was wonderful.  Does it just happen?  No, there must be some secret there.  How does it happen that slits of light teach, ringing door bells teach, a photo of father who was a soldier teaches – and he isn’t even alive, the father; he didn’t come back from the war, but he teaches!

Maybe there is an upbringing without upbringing?

Even children know where children come from; but where do good children come from?

Parenting for everyone is quite a difficult science, as all sciences are.  It does not instruct how to live and what to be.  It does not even prescribe recipes for upbringing.  It only investigates in which circumstances children will be all right, and in which circumstances they will definitely get into trouble.

·         What are two basic needs of children?

·         Why is parental suspicion dreadful for children souls?

·         Why does a burning desire for happiness matter the most?

·         Where does evil come from?

·         Is it possible to indulge a child with joy?

·         How do problems in upbringing turn out to be problems of justice?

·         What is needed for compassion to appear in a child?

·         Who has the right to be irritated?

·         Why is power struggle the worst thing in parenting?

·         Why is magnanimity a must in upbringing?

·         Do children learn from their successes and achievements or from their mistakes?

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